Unanswered questions

(image from xkcd.com)

In my search for wisdom and in my observation of people's burdens here on earth, I discovered that there is ceaseless activity, day and night. I realized that no one can discover everything God is doing under the sun. Not even the wisest people discover everything, no matter what they claim.

- Ecclesiastes 8:16-17 (NLT)

This is how the footnote in my study bible explains this verse: "Even if we had access to all the world's wisdom, the wisest man would know very little. No one can fully comprehend God and all that he has done, and there are always more questions than answers. But the unknown should not cast a shadow over our joy, faith, or work because we know that someone greater is in control and that we can put our trust in him. Don't let what you don't know about the future destroy the joy God wants to give you today."

I worked at an after-school care center my freshman and sophomore years of college. I was in charge of a dozen four-year-olds. As far as kids go, this age group is pretty fun to work with: they aren't in diapers and usually have decent control over their bladders at this point; they can speak up and tell you if they're hungry, tired, etc, and sometimes they speak English incorrectly in the most adorable way ("Teacher, he hurted me!").

A couple of years later, they'll think they know everything there is to know, but at this age their favorite word is "Why?" They are so curious about the world around them. There were times they would ask me questions that I didn't know the answers to, but if I told them, "I don't know," they would ask me why I didn't know and press for an answer, any answer other than "I just don't know." Seriously, I could make up some b.s. answer and they would be happy with that, as long as I didn't tell them "I don't know." I tried not to do that, though, because it didn't seem right to b.s. a four-year-old, no matter how persistent.

I'm 27 years old, yet I'm still like a preschooler in my constant desire to know all the answers. Usually my curiosity serves me well. Questioning and keeping an open mind are good things and not to be discouraged. I hope my day on Earth never comes when I cease to ask questions entirely, arrogantly assuming that I have everything figured out.

However, my curiosity and tendency to ask questions can be a detriment at times. If something happens to me that hurts, that is confusing, or that I simply don't know how to respond to right away, I tend to over analyze the situation in my quest for figuring out "why." Often I'll try to come to a conclusion that I simply cannot come to without further information or time. I'm not always so patient with "waiting to see what happens."

In these situations, I want to determine the outcome before it arrives. This is when I have to remind myself that God has a plan that is beyond my current understanding and control. And there are some things I may never understand. But, of course, I want a sneak-preview of how it will all work out. I don't want to hear, "I don't know."

Like the preschoolers, sometimes I think I'd rather hear a b.s. answer than not have any answer at all. The trouble with that is it tends to start the slippery slope toward self-deception. And the biggest b.s. answer is that my way and my timing is better than waiting for God's plan to unfold.

But, why? (just kidding)